I have a new man in my life. It’s early days and I’m not sure how it’s all going to pan out with him, but I’m committed to this relationship and determined to make it work. If only I could shake off the terrible guilt I feel about leaving my old love behind and put all my efforts into developing my passion for the new one.
Before you think that I’m having way too much fun and should really be behaving with more dignity as befits a woman of more mature years, I should point out that the new man (and the old one, come to that) is a fictional character. My new hero.
Yes, I have been busy writing the first draft of Book Two, and almost thirty thousand words in I am finally getting to grips with who this enigmatic man really is. We haven’t had an easy start to our relationship. Oh no. The problem was, I was still far too absorbed in the hero of Book One. I quite fell for him. Honestly. I felt I knew him so well and he was quite adorable. Often, sitting at my desk at work, I would find myself thinking of him and smile to myself. I really do hope this is normal. If not I must sound like a complete lunatic.
I didn’t expect to fall in love with him but, really, I should have. After all, when I read other writers’ books I quite often fall for the hero. I think it’s essential actually. If the reader can’t love him how can she believe the heroine will? And I do have form. I mean, I have had to grudgingly accept that maybe, just maybe, there is a remote possibility that The Doctor isn’t real and there’s no such thing as a Tardis and it might actually be pure fiction, but that hasn’t stopped me falling for David Tennant and Matt Smith. And Sherlock is definitely fictional but…no, I’d better not get started on Benedict Cumberbatch or I will forget what it was I was supposed to be talking about entirely.
Ah yes, falling for fictional heroes! Well, as Book One winged its way through the ether to my five generous and kind-hearted beta-readers, I settled down to Book Two and my new hero and heroine. It should have been easy. Both characters appear in the first novel, albeit in minor roles, (one more minor than the other!) and therefore I did kind of know them already. The heroine was quite easy. I grew to know and love her as I was writing the first book, but the hero… let’s just say he didn’t reveal much about himself and it was almost like starting from scratch with him.
After weeks of trying to figure him out and growing increasingly desperate because – well – he just didn’t make my heart pound – I decided I had to take drastic action. I Googled “gorgeous actors in their thirties” and spent a delightful hour or so looking at the results. Yes, I really did do this. It’s amazing what I have Googled in the last year or two! Anyway, I made a shortlist and picked one I really liked from a couple of programmes I had seen him in. Then I watched them again. It was the tone of his voice, the look in his eyes, the way he could flick from seemingly uncaring and cold to gentle and concerned that did it. Yep, I had my man. Picture in my head, I had a little chat with him and asked him, quite politely, why he wasn’t floating my boat and what was he keeping from me. Turns out, he was keeping quite a lot from me, and by the end of our brainstorming session I found that my interest in him was growing and there may even have been the first tentative shoots of attraction appearing, like the first daffodils of spring pushing their way out into a weary world.
So, we’re taking our first tentative steps in this new romance. I do find myself comparing him sometimes to my other hero, which is very unfair as I was in that relationship for nearly two-and-a-half years and this is still early days, so I banish all my disloyal thoughts and concentrate on my new love. And yes, we’re getting there. I found myself thinking about him at work one day this week and realised I was smiling. A sure sign that we’re on our way.
Better finish here. I think the men in white coats are coming up the path carrying what looks suspiciously like a strait-jacket.
Have a great week! xx